CONFRONTING OTHERS - WHAT'S THE PURPOSE?...to humiliate, win an argument, pontificate - or to restore, reconcile and fulfill the law of Christ

Update:

Pastor John Piper also has an excellent article on this very issue. I commend it to you highly.

Behold my Servant, whom I uphold,

my chosen, in whom my soul delights;

I have put my Spirit upon him;

he will bring forth justice to the nations.

2 He will not cry aloud or lift up his voice,

or make it heard in the street;

3 a bruised reed he will not break,

and a faintly burning wick he will not quench;

he will faithfully bring forth justice.

4 He will not grow faint or be discouraged

till he has established justice in the earth;

and the coastlands wait for his law.

-Isaiah 42:1-4

It is easy to swing a hammer at another Christian you might disagree with. It comes all to naturally to us. It doesn't take much effort or thought to bury someone on a blog or website. Even if we are 100% in the right, it doesn't demonstrate Christlikeness to simply wind up and let the hammer strike the anvil of the soul of another to show them how much we are right. But it does draw the readership, the hits to our site explode, and our words will spread through the blogosphere at amazing speed. And all under the noble guise of: "I am just standing up for the truth."

I know about this tactic first hand, for I say to my shame I was really good at it. I enjoyed it. I justified it and clothed my stinging words biblically and theologically. I mixed careful - thorough research with biting sarcasm and a touch of irreverent humor. I belittled my oppenent to make his claims look foolish; did the necessary homework on most everything they had preached or written on a given topic; and at the end of the day usually won the argument. People applauded me; cheered me on; and even thanked me.

But I was very wrong in doing so. I may have been on the right side on most issues - but I was dead wrong on the methods. I've seen this of late again with some other blogs; it reminds me of how wounding my pen had become a thing to behold.

"If the tongue is a fire,

the Internet is a nuclear bomb; 

and blogs, if wrongly used,

are the radioactive waste 

that endangers us all."

-Pastor Scott Thomas, Director of Acts29

Beloved, truth wielded in love takes time and care to communicate. Strong doctrine and theological conviction spoken pastorally for the restoration of another and their edification, encouragement and exhortation must be bathed in prayer to heal. Confronting another who has a blind spot in their life and ministry takes humility, grace, gentleness, patience and forbearance to guard the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. We must remember that it is the kindness of God that leads to repentance. It is the ministry of the Holy Spirit, the Word, and the Lord Jesus Christ in sanctification that will conform us to Himself. "The Lord loves those whom He chastens..." But it is He who does the chastening beloved; and may God convict us all if we try to assume that role that only belongs to Him alone.

Should we speak boldly for the truth, contend for the faith, and champion the gospel? Absolutely! Should we encourage each other to love and good works? Yes! Should we plead with others with tears to turn and repent if we see them heading down a wrong path? Unquestionably! But let us do so with self-sacrificial love, reverence for God and respect for one another. May we do so abandoning anger, wrath, slander, gossip, bitterness and malice. May we not strive to just be right, win an argument, publicly champion an issue, and on our blogs try to one up each other by tearing each other to pieces in the combox turning someone's life, ministry, and failings into blogging sport for the week. 

Who do we think we are? Have we so quickly forgotten our own redemption and daily sanctification? Have we forgotten that none of us have arrived at this thing called gracelife? Have we forgotten the depth of our own depravity and the daily work of the Spirit in our lives? Then shouldn't we be willing to extend a severe mercy to others that we ourselves have had extended to us? And to do so without condoning the sin, but still walking with and loving the sinner with Calvary love? 

The patriarch of his time, the Apostle Paul, when confronting a younger Timothy on some real concerns about life and doctrine, did so not with a hammer, but with the heart of a pastor. He ministered to him; he didn't malign him.

May we seek another's restoration, reconciliation, and repentance to see them useful for the kingdom; for the furtherance of the gospel; for the benefit of His church; and for the glory of God as a testimony of His unfailing love and fathomless grace.

IOW beloved, don't be like me; but strive to be like the Lord Jesus and reflect His character to each other and as a witness to a dying world.

To that end, I commend to you the following words of one of my favorite Puritan divines - Thomas Watson. Here are a few quotes from him on the ministry of our Great Physician, Jesus Christ the Lord to us in our salvation, sanctification, and glorification. May they encourage you as they have myself today.

"Christ heals with more ease than any other. Christ makes the devil go out with a word (Mark 9:25). Nay, he can cure with a look: Christ's look melted Peter into repentance; it was a healing look. If Christ doth but cast a look upon the soul he can recover it. Therefore David prays to have a look from God, 'Look Thou upon me, and be merciful unto me' (Psalm 119:132)."

"Christ is the most tender-hearted physician. He hath ended his passion but not his compassion. He is not more full of skill than sympathy, 'He healed the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds' (Psalm 147:3). Every groan of the patient goes to the heart of the physician."

"Christ never fails of success. Christ never undertakes to heal any but he makes a certain cure, 'Those that thou gavest me I have kept, and none of them is lost,' (John 17:12). Other physicians can only cure them that are sick, but Christ cures them that are dead, 'And you hat he quickened who were dead' (Eph 2:1). Christ is a physician for the dead, of every one whom Christ cures, it may be said, 'He was dead, and is alive again' (Luke 15:32)."

"Christ is the most bountiful physician. Other patients do enrich their physicians, but here the physician doth enrich the patient. Christ elevates all his patients: he doth not only cure them but crown them (Rev. 2:10). Christ doth not only raise them from the bed, but to the throne; he gives the sick man not only health but also heaven."